Relationship Dating

What Girls Want...

Do you know what girls want?

what girls want Itís an age-old question that always gets an open-ended answer...and with good reason.

Note: this article is about what girls desire, not what women want.

(Wondering what exactly differs between a "girl" and a "woman"? You can read about the differences between females, here.)

Neither guys nor girls truly know exactly what girls want. Every girl is slightly different from the next; each has different values and goals (while it seems that some may have no values or goals at all).

Therefore, while it is possible to know the broad stroked of what girls want - knowing all of the fine details isn't.

man thinking
If you randomly ask a girl what the ideal boyfriend would be like, she would likely say something along the lines of "he is caring, he loves me, he takes care of me..." Basically, "he treats me like a goddess".

However, if you dig deeper, you will find that they also demand something else. "My ideal boyfriend would be popular, self-confident, and hot." Hmmm.

Comparing the two descriptions, you can't help but picture two completely different men. One is the cocky, funny guy (essentially a "jerk") and the other is calm, loving guy (the "nice guy").

8 out of 10 times the "jerk" will win the girl.

Why do nice guys finish last?

A couple reasons...

The first deals with science and DNA. Females are programmed, from an evolutionary standpoint, to seek out and unite with the dominant male of a group. The status is important - it is part of what girls want.

One million years ago, a female's goal was to attract and mate with the "alpha male", not with one of the weaker males.

Today (deep within a girl's instincts) the same rules are in place. The confident "leader" beat the nice guy "follower" back then; he continues the same pattern to this day.

The next reason is that the jerk shows signals of superiority, while the nice guy's habits imply inferiority.

After a date, the jerk won't contact a girl for a week or until she calls him - the nice guy is usually much quicker on the trigger, often calling the next day or (gasp) the same night. This gives the unintentional impression of being needy or even insecure.

Most girls find the characteristics of "needy" and "insecure" extremely unattractive and thus steer away from males displaying these attributes. (Most characteristics that can be considered as feminine in nature aren't what girls want in their man - it results with you being placed in the friend zone.)

Another reason nice guys finish last is that, deep down, girls like to view you as a challenge. A mystery. They enjoy working for your attention and attraction.

Nice guys are well known for showering girls in sweet compliments whether it is morning or night, dressed for a date or without make up...

"You are so pretty." "Your eyes are amazing.Ē "Your smile is perfect." "I love the shirt." The challenge is over in the girl's mind, she has your constant attention and your attraction - Game over.

The jerk will compliment much less, or compliment in a fashion that leaves her on her toes and feeling a little confused as to what he means...

"Your eyes always cross when you laugh, it is so cute." "The only thing hotter than you is me." "That shirt looks really nice, but I don't know if the color really matches your hair" The girl feels constantly challenged to gain your approval and attraction - Game on.

Note: there is a difference between giving off-colored compliments and insulting her. Don't insult a girl, it only works against you.

Additionally, what girls want is status for themselves and a very good way of establishing higher status is to unite with someone whom already holds that position.

Using an athlete example, if Lisa has to pick between two potential males for a boyfriend and if every single attribute and characteristic is equal between the two males except that one is the starting quarterback and the other is the backup quarterback, the starting QB will be picked every single time.

sexy girl Girls want an attractive male. When considering physical aspects, girls focus on how "hot" they find a male, while women favor strong and tall bodies over facial structure.

Often if a girl finds you attractive but her group does not, she will simply pass you by because she is not willing to compromise her social status.

Status is extremely important to girls, it doesnít matter if it is rational or not, this is just how it has always been and will stay.


Girls want a confident, attractive male that challenges them to work for his attention while he also possesses a high status in their social network (i.e. popular).

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